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| Afraid Yet? [message #88994] |
Thu, 20 May 2004 10:52   |
KIRBY098
Messages: 1546
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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General (1 Star) |
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This is a strangely relevant joke.
ORDERING PIZZA IN 2008
This is so close to what is probably going to be happening in 2008 that we're not sure how funny this really is.
Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?
Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.
Operator: I must have your NIDM first, sir.
Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610.
Operator: Thank you Mr Bob. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland
Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at
Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email
address is bob @home. net. Which number are you calling from sir?
Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?
Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.
Customer: The HSS, what is that?
Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.
Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your
All-Meat Special pizzas.
Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.
Customer: Whaddya mean?
Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that
you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol.
Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice.
Customer: What?!?! What do you recommend, then?
Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.
Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?
Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your
local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion.
Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.
Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids,
and your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.
Customer: Lemme give you my credit card number.
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash.
Your credit card balance is over its limit
Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your
driver gets here.
Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is
overdrawn also.
Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready.
How long will it take?
Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45
minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick'em up while you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward.
Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?
Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your
car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the
tank yesterday.
Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@#
Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got
a July 4, 2003 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see
here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge.
Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?
Customer: (speechless)
Operator: Will there be anything else, sir?
Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke.
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us
from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this.
Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.
Deleted
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89020] |
Thu, 20 May 2004 13:04 |
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bigejoe14
Messages: 1302
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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General (1 Star) |
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It' just a bunch of Liberals trying to scare us again. Just ignore them...
WHATEVER, FAGGOT
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89024] |
Thu, 20 May 2004 13:18 |
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Bigejoe, the medias are doing a way better job at scaring americans than them.
I suck cock and love it... absolutely love it. And I just got banned for being too immature to be allowed to post here.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89125] |
Thu, 20 May 2004 21:42 |
Phoenix - Aeon
Messages: 221
Registered: April 2004
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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Actually the majority of the american media is republican, ever noticed how much Fox supports Bush?
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89157] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 05:26 |
KIRBY098
Messages: 1546
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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General (1 Star) |
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Yes, which is ironic considering most of the folks offering thier unqualified opinions are unable to vote yet.
Deleted
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89186] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 09:42 |
Phoenix - Aeon
Messages: 221
Registered: April 2004
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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Actually I am able to vote. Also I mention Fox seeing as how it is a subsidudary of the News Corporation, y'know the biggest media corporation in the world, here's a few things they own:
Fox Television Stations;
WNYW - New York City
WWOR - New York City
KTTV - Los Angeles
KCOP - Los Angeles
WFLD - Chicago
WPWR - Chicago
KMSP - Minneapolis
WFTC - Minneapolis
WTXF - Philadelphia
WFXT - Boston
WTTG - Washington D.C.
KDFW - Dallas
KDFI - Dallas
WJBK - Detroit
KUTP - Phoenix
KSAZ - Phoenix
WUTB - Baltimore
WRBW - Orlando
WOFL - Orlando
WOGX - Ocala
WAGA - Atlanta
KRIV - Houston
KTXH - Houston
WJW - Cleveland
WTVT - Tampa
KDVR - Denver
KTVI - St. Louis
WITI - Milwaukee
WDAF - Kansas City
KSTU - Salt Lake City
WHBQ - Memphis
WGHP - Greensboro
WBRC - Birmingham
KTBC - Austin
BSkyB
FOXTEL
SKYPerfecTV
STAR
Stream
Fox News Channel
Fox Movie Channel
FX
National Geographic Channel
SPEED Channel
Fox Sports Net
Fox Sports South
Fox Sports Pittsburgh
Fox Sports Southeast
Fox Sports Midwest
Fox Sports Rocky Mountain
Fox Sports Arizona
Fox Sports Northwest
Fox Sports West
Fox Sports West#2
Fox Sports Detroit
Fox Sports Bay Area (with Rainbow Media Holdings)
Fox Sports Chicago (with Rainbow Media Holdings)
Fox Sports New England (with Rainbow Media)
Fox Sports New York (with Rainbow Media)
Fox Sports Ohio (with Rainbow Media)
Fox Sports Intermountain West
Fox Sports Southwest
Sunshine Network
Madison Square Garden Network
Film;
20th Century Fox
Fox Searchlight Pictures
Fox Television Studios
Newspapers;
United States;
New York Post
United Kingdom;
News International
News of the World
The Sun
The Sunday Times
The Times
Australia;
Daily Telegraph
Fiji Times
Gold Coast Bulletin
Herald Sun
Newsphotos
Newspix
Newstext
NT News
Post-Courier
Sunday Herald Sun
Sunday Mail
Sunday Tasmanian
Sunday Territorian
Sunday Times
The Advertiser
The Australian
The Courier-Mail
The Mercury
The Sunday Telegraph
Weekly Times
Magazines;
InsideOut
donna hay
SmartSource
The Weekly Standard
TV Guide (partial)
Books;
HarperCollins Publishers
HarperCollins General Book Group
HarperCollins
Perennial
Cliff Street Books
The Ecco Press
Quill
HarperAudio
Regan Books
Amistad Press
Zondervan
Morrow/Avon
William Morrow
Avon
HarperTorch
Eos
HarperEntertainment
HarperSanFrancisco
HarperInformation
HarperBusiness
HarperResource
Access Travel
William Morrow Cookbooks
Branded Books Program
HarperCollins Children's Book Group
Greenwillow Books
Joanna Cotler Books
Laura Geringer Books
HarperCollins HarperFestival
HarperTrophy
Tempest
Other;
Los Angeles Dodgers
New York Rangers & New York Knicks (20% - Through partnership with Cablevision)
Los Angeles Kings (NHL, 40% option)
Los Angeles Lakers (NBA, 9.8% option)
Staples Center (40% owned by Fox/Liberty)
News America New Media
Fox Sports Radio Network
Broadsystem
Festival Records
Fox Interactive
Mushroom Records
National Rugby League
NDS
News Interactive
News Outdoor
Nursery World
is that enough right wing media for you, next time you want to patronize some-one about the media, try not to do it to a media graduate.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89223] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 13:58 |
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smwScott
Messages: 225
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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Man you people are fucking stupid. You read a news report about a computer system that scans the personal information of millions of Americans to determine their likelihood of being a terrorist, and are then arrested based on this information. You say to yourself, hey this doesn't sound too good, I don't like this. So do you admit that it's another way government is slowly growing bigger and bigger and we're drifting farther and farther away from our constitution? Nope, you dismiss the news report on account of it coming from "liberal media," despite the fact that you can get an idea of what the MATRIX system is capable of from their own site.
Pretty soon the fucking thing will be scanning regular people to determine their likelihood to commit a crime. It started with the Patriot Act and now this shit is going way too far.
-smwScott
47% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89236] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 15:23 |
JadenStriker
Messages: 57
Registered: April 2004
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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The reason why it is so easily dismissed is because there are rules and regulations against abusing the system in the manner which you speeck of. The users of the system are denied the privliged to just arbitraily scan a bunch of people in that manner, there has to be a cause for the scan or the commetty is commeting an illegal act. You know, it is like the everyday police, they can't bust into your house and search for drugs unless they have a warrent, and they cannont get a warrant unless strong enough adnormal events have occured to provocate them to do so.
The use of Maxtrix is legal limited to those who have been in adnormal enough events to legaly use the system on them. People like you and me don't have too worry about being scanneed for likely hood to commet a crime as EVERY FUCKING PERSON could likely commet a crime. Using the system for that would be a pointless witch hunt and a total waste of money. So many people would be getting arrested if the matrix was used that way that the courts would be begging for the system to be turned off or our nation would goto civil war. No one is that fuycking stupid to abuse the Matrix in that manner except power hungry, mallishes people who don't give a damn about this countries well being, and we do care.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89253] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 16:01 |
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smwScott
Messages: 225
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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Actually many of those rights you speak of are temporarily suspended by the Patriot Act. The government can scan any computer, tap any phone, or raid any house as long as they have any suspicion of terrorist activity. They no longer need warrants. You say people like us don't need to worry about this, but American citizens have been arrested using these tactics.
And of course the system wouldn't be used to scan every person who could possibly commit a crime, because every person in the world could do just about anything under the right circumstances, but it could deem that certain people have a particularly high tendency to do something criminal. Very similar to how it determines that certain people are more likely to commit a terrorist act...
But that's really aside the point. Our rights are being stripped away by the government constantly instituting more invasive methods of law enforcement. It comes down to how much freedom you're willing to give up for a false sense of security.
-smwScott
47% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89275] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 16:34 |
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| hydra1945 |
Majority of the media = liberal.
So how can the media do a better job than the liberals when the two are virtually one-and-the-same?
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You'd sound pethatic in Canada.
I suck cock and love it... absolutely love it. And I just got banned for being too immature to be allowed to post here.
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| Afraid Yet? [message #89294] |
Fri, 21 May 2004 19:10 |
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smwScott
Messages: 225
Registered: February 2003
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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| Nodbugger |
smwScott...you are wrong on so many levels.
Yes the government can do it. But your local police department cannot. They don't have the resources to do it. They still need permission to do this. They just don't need written permission. Instead o going to court they can do a simple phone call.
And one American has been arrested using the patriot act (even though he woul have been arested either way) and is being charged now.
So it does not strip away rights. Only criminals get their rights taken away.
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Well, it does strip away peoples rights, and it appears to be the first step to a more oppressive government. The constitution written in a way to prevent this kind of abuse from taking place, the Patriot Act is in direct violation of the constitution. Everything about it is against what this country stands for. People can be taken and jailed without trial or even being officially arrested. Things are already out of hand and they're getting worse, it always starts out fairly tame, but it will grow and continue unless someone puts a stop to it.
-smwScott
47% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
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