| The m00trix [message #80648] |
Fri, 16 April 2004 05:26  |
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Rex
Messages: 107
Registered: March 2003
Location: Netherlands
Karma: 0
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Recruit |
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Rex wakes up at his office.
* Rex thinks: "OMG! It was all a dream!"
UPS Guy: Mr. Perkins?
Rex: No, he's in the next cubicle.
UPS Guy: Oh, I had some muffins here and ...-
Rex: Oh! Yeah! That's me!!!
UPS Guy: Here you go. *pause while he signs it* You know, my momma always used to say that life was like a box o' chocolates...
Rex: So?
UPS Guy: I'll just go now.
Rex: What are you waiting for?
* Rex starts eating muffins like there was no tomorrow. Sound of phone ringing in next cubicle.
DaveGMN: Who is this?... There's no Rex here... What the hell are you on about? Just a second...
* DaveGMN puts his head over the top of the cubicle.
DaveGMN: Any Rex over here?
Rex: Yeah, that's me!
DaveGMN: You didn't get the muffins I ordered, did you?
Rex: ...... Hell no.
DaveGMN: Oh... OK. (Disappears again)
* Rex answers the phone.
Rex: Hello?
Barry: Hello, Rex. You *know * who this is.
Rex: God?
Barry: No...
Rex Are you one of those telemarketing people?
Barry: No...
Rex: .... Mum?
Barry: Look, we don't have time for you to insult me any further. You can no longer await the black rabbit, Neo. They're coming.
Rex: Wha?
Barry: Are you frightened?
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: Not nearly frightened enough. I know what hunts you. Look at the elevator.
Rex: I don't see anyone, unless they're behind the three threatening looking guys in sunglasses that I dreamed off a few min ago.
Barry: My God you're annoying, don't you have a life?
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: Just go to the opposite cubicle.
Rex: But what if they-
Barry: I don't give a damn.
Rex: Oh, OK.
*Mysterious women comes round the corner.
Barry: Go to the office at the end of the hall.
Rex: OK.
* Rex crouches down and runs down towards the office.
UPS Guy: Run, Neo, run!
Rex: Shut the fuck up, UPS Guy!!!
* Rex reaches the office.
Barry: Now. Outside the window there is a scaffold.
Rex: OMG! How do you know all this?
Barry: That doesn't matter. Go on, up the scaffold, there's a good boy.
Rex: But I don't wanna...
Barry: I DON'T CARE!
Rex: Hmph. Why's everyone so mean to me?
Barry: I can't possibly imagine.
/me Rex climbs out of window and reaches scaffold.
Barry: Good job!
Rex: Well doh...
Barry: Now listen up! If you want to know what the m00trix is all about, come to the Javabridge at exactly 11 pm tonight.
Rex: Ok, I'll be there.
To be continued...
---
Credits go to myself and a few others who helped me with this text.
You can rent this signature for 2 euros/month.
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| The m00trix [message #80681] |
Fri, 16 April 2004 07:09  |
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Rex
Messages: 107
Registered: March 2003
Location: Netherlands
Karma: 0
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Itwas meant to be a reply on the m00hack thread..... :\ :\ Do i have to move it?
You can rent this signature for 2 euros/month.
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| Re: The m00trix [message #80839] |
Fri, 16 April 2004 17:11 |
tankk135
Messages: 40
Registered: April 2004
Karma: 0
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what does this have to do with renegade?
anything at all
i didnt think so
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| The m00trix [message #80937] |
Fri, 16 April 2004 20:59 |
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IRON FART
Messages: 1989
Registered: September 2003
Location: LOS ANGELES
Karma: 0
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General (1 Star) |
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| [RoC |
Twix]wow rex, rofl.. lame
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Good choice of words.
| Quote: |
Quote from IRC
<[Digital]> get man_fucking_a_car.mpg
<[Digital]> ah fuck wrong window
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| The m00trix [message #80953] |
Fri, 16 April 2004 23:29 |
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U927
Messages: 709
Registered: February 2003
Location: Ft. Lauderdale, FL
Karma: 0
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Colonel |
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| [RoC |
Twix]wow rex, rofl.. lame
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This is coming from the person who says he DOES have m00hack. :rolleyes:
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act but a habit. - Aristotle
8-Bit Theatre. The power of evil compels you!
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| The m00trix [message #81583] |
Mon, 19 April 2004 00:43 |
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Rex
Messages: 107
Registered: March 2003
Location: Netherlands
Karma: 0
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PS1: This story is totally 100% fiction. If I used your name, it doesn't mean I hate you or that you do cheat or whatever. It probably means I like you or that you perfectly fit in the role...
PS2: I needed some females, so if you are a male and I added you as a female and we have some x-rated scenes, don't take it personally...
-----
(Under the Java bridge)
Rex: *running up to car* I'm.... here....
Twix: You're late.
Rex: I wanted to keep you all waiting to build up the tension.
Twix: :rolleyes: Get in.
Rex: Hell yeah! (getting in) Ok, tell me what is the m00trix!
Twix: (slamming door behind Rex) Dosmac, floor it!
The car drives away.
* Hids pulls out gun and points it at Rex.
* Rex is in shock:  and battles internally over which question to ask first...
Rex: What is the m00trix?
Twix: I can't tell you that.
Rex: WHAT?
Hids: Take off your shirt.
Rex: YOU SAID YOU WOULD TELL ME WHAT THE m00TRIX IS!
Twix: Rex...
Rex: LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!!
Twix: Rex, you'll get to know what it is, later.
Rex: Oh OK.
Hids: Take off your shirt.
Rex: Wha?
Hids: Just do it.
Rex: Hell no.
* Rex opens the car door.
Twix: Rex, you have to trust me.
Rex: But you lied about the m00trix!
Twix: Yes, but-
Rex: But you lied about the m00trix!
Twix: Rex-
Rex: But you lied about the m00trix!
Twix: REX-
Rex: But you lied about the m00trix!
Twix: Rex, I SWEAR TO GOD-
Rex: ....... But you lied about the m00trix!
Hids: PLEASE can I shoot him? PLEASE?
Twix: I'm tempted, Hids. I'm tempted.
Hids: It's either him or me!
Twix: Goddamn prophecy.... First you saddle me with Dante, and now... But Rex, you know that road. You know exactly where it ends.
Rex: Oh, it's one of THOSE roads.... :rolleyes:
[i]* Rex shuts car door again.[/b]
Rex: I don't wanna ruin my hair...
Hids: Take off your shirt.
Rex: OK.
Hids: And your jacket.
Rex: ....OK.
Hids: And your pants.
Dosmac: Switch!
Hids: Grrrrr... :twisted:
Twix: I'm going to allow this...
Rex: Hell no!
Hids: FINE then, just the shirt. (muttering) Damn...
[i]* Hids does weird thing and pulls out bug.
Rex: Wow, my mum always warned me that one day I'd find something living in there.....
--------
(Pull up outside very dramatic looking building)
Rex: Dude! We're going on the 'Tower of Terror'?
Twix: No, Rex. This is just an apartment building.
Rex: .... It's freaky looking.
They go upstairs.
Rex: Why... couldn't... we... have.... taken... the... lift?
Twix: Cos then the Wachowski brothers couldn't have had a dramatic shot down the stairwell.
Rex: ..... Fair enough.
Twix: Can I give you one piece of advice...
Rex: Hey, where did Hids and Dosmac go?
Twix: ... OK, two pieces of advice. ONE - don't try to understand everything, it's not the right time yet
Rex: Awww.
Twix: TWO - I can't remember what I was supposed to say... dammit, Hids told me to tell you... Eh, what the hell, just be honest. He knows more than you could possibly imagine.
Rex: Hmmm... Ok, I guess.
-----
(Go inside. Dramatic flash of lightning illuminates Morpheus)
Rex: AAAARGH!!!! ITS DRACULA!!!!
Twix: No it's not. This is Barry.
Rex: I thought we were going to see someone who has the m00hack?
Twix: Well, he has the m00hack.
Rex: Oh, yeah, SUUURE you did.
Barry: Rex, chill. Give me your phone.
Rex: Hell no!
Barry: Sorry. Force of hobbit. I mean habit! HABIT! What is with me always saying that?
Twix: Maybe its because you're always making us go into the m00trix so that you can see the Lord of the Rings...
Barry: Oh yeah... Anyway, Rex, have a seat.
* Rex sits down.
Barry: As you may have guessed, I am Barry-
Rex: Hey! You have a big gap in your teeth!
Barry: 
Twix: *hits self on head* Be honest, but DON'T mention Barry's tooth gap...
Barry: Yes.
Rex: What? Its really big!
Barry: ...Don't you feel like Alice?
Rex: Alice who?
Barry: Alice in Wonderland.
Rex: Wonderland?
Barry: It's a book.
Rex: Book?
Barry: It's a book title. Alice in Wonderland. Don't you feel like Alice?
Rex: Why, what happened to this Alice Inwonderland?
Barry: OMG. why couldn't DANTE have been the one?
Twix: Don't know who I'd prefer, really.
Barry: You have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because he expects to wake up.
Rex: Well, no, cos I already pinched myself, but that doesn't always work, cos once I had this dream where I was surrounded by lotsa beautiful women, and I was like WHOA, must be dreaming, but pinching myself didn't work then...
Barry: Shut up.
Rex: Yessir.
Barry: You accept what you see because you expect to wake up.
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: Do you believe in fate?
Rex: Hell no.
Barry: Is this because you don't like to feel that you're not in control of your actions?
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: I know EX-ACT-LY what you mean.
Rex: Hell no.
Barry: Let me tell you why you're here. You're here because you know something. What you know you can't explain. Blah blah blah blah blah.
* Rex thinks: "OMG! I only wanted to cheat on Renegade, this story takes ages..."
Barry: .. Blah blah blah. Do you know what I'm talking about?
Rex: Hell no.
Barry: The m00trix.
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: Do you want to know what IT is?
Rex: Hell no.
Barry: OK, are you TRYING to piss me off?
Rex: Hell yeah.
Barry: You are just ANNOYING.
Rex: Go to hell.
Barry: Goddammit, the m00trix IS EVERYWHERE!!!!!
Rex: .. What the hell?
Barry: It is in this very room.
Rex: IT IS??? (jumps to his feet and starts running around in circles) Helphelphelphelphelphelphelp....
Barry: Rex, calm down...
Rex: Helphelphelphelphelphelp... WHY?
Barry: Calm down! It's just the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.
Rex: Oh yeah, and that makes me feel better?
Barry: It's supposed to... You see it when you look out of your window-
Rex: What window? My apartment has no window.
Twix: YES IT DOES!!!!
Rex: FINE!!! Just thought it sounded more tragic...
Barry: You feel it when you go to work, when go to church, when you pay your taxes, blah blah blah...
Rex: Uh huh. Right. Hm. Where is it again?
Barry: ...... Everywhere.
Rex: What, out there?
Barry: Even inside you.
Rex: What, in there?
* Rex bends over and starts talking to himself: "Hello... hello..."
Barry: Please stop it.
Rex: Oh, OK.
Barry: But I can't tell you what the m00trix is...
Rex: Then why the hell have you just been talking for about ten minutes straight?
Barry: Here, red pill or blue pill?
Rex: Uh... Can't I have what's behind door number two?
Barry: No.
Rex: Aw...
Barry: You take the blue pill, nothing happens, cos the pill is empty. You take the red pill, something cool will happen, cos the red pill has m00hack inside.
* Rex takes the red pill.
* Barry slaps Rex, the m00trix has you
Rex: Why did you do that for?
Barry: Oh, I was getting bored.
You can rent this signature for 2 euros/month.
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| The m00trix [message #82492] |
Thu, 22 April 2004 14:19 |
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cowmisfit
Messages: 2035
Registered: May 2003
Karma: 0
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General (2 Stars) |
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| j_ball430 |
You gotta love his enthusiasm though. He doesn't want cheating in Renegade, but hey, some people get mad easy too.
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BAH! Joke or not, by brining up this bullshit he did, he gave cheat makers ideas, he is a fucking moron, and a fucking n00b, and a fucking cheater most likely. I dont want cheats in renegade, i dont want cheats in any games i play, stupid fucks like this guy just make them even stronger.
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